either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
It all started with a game of naked twister.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
