Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
The beers last night were like the tears from god
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
