IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
