To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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