You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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