coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
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