Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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