You're so nebulous sometimes
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
