Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me