stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I understand Curling. That high.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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