I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
