I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
