..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
