Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
