I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
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i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
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I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.