when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
