Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
He called his prostate his "boner button".
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
