I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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