I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Randomize