I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Randomize