Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
