I need help removing her.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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