I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
