My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I see more hoeing in ur future
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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