Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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