I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
