You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
PANTIES FOUND
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