We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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