Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
