I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize