OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
