Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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