Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
it was like his penis was on wheels.
if only i could text you this smell
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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