I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
