can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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