every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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