Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
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