jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I am available for nakedness
Randomize
