you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
