You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
