happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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