my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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