I must be too annoying 4 u.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
