I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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