before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Randomize
