He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
