thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
