I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
