didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
