Texts From Last Night

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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....

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  (704): you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face.... http://tfl.nu/3wos
  Replies (24) Good night (1325) Bad night (3728)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.

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  (330): I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included. http://tfl.nu/hd7g
  Replies (32) Good night (6592) Bad night (909)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.

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  (814): I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade. http://tfl.nu/dxnr
  Replies (14) Good night (1305) Bad night (3371)
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  (209): View more from California

  Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?

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  (209): Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on? http://tfl.nu/ru4x
  Replies (20) Good night (3785) Bad night (1486)
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  (551): View more from New Jersey

  I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week

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  (551): I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week http://tfl.nu/k48u
  Replies (6) Good night (2396) Bad night (1031)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.

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  (517): well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle. http://tfl.nu/5dkw
  Replies (11) Good night (1817) Bad night (1829)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.

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  (610): The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom. (484): I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you. http://tfl.nu/hypz
  Replies (7) Good night (4693) Bad night (961)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I left it in that guy's dorm room.

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  (613): come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?! (902): I left it in that guy's dorm room. http://tfl.nu/1k29
  Replies (4) Good night (1738) Bad night (727)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!

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  (678): Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?! http://tfl.nu/sa9o
  Replies (10) Good night (2224) Bad night (746)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.

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  (330): You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower. http://tfl.nu/aao1
  Replies (6) Good night (1465) Bad night (576)
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  (213): View more from California

  If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude

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  (213): If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude http://tfl.nu/zznc
  Replies (2) Good night (1146) Bad night (475)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.

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  (423): People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store. http://tfl.nu/4ti5
  Replies (9) Good night (615) Bad night (626)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....

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  (713): It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking.... http://tfl.nu/vznz
  Replies (1) Good night (730) Bad night (323)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?

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  (602): I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this? http://tfl.nu/qto4
  Replies (1) Good night (509) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Youre having a picnic

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.

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  (630): Youre having a picnic (773): Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand. http://tfl.nu/oqq4
  Replies (3) Good night (912) Bad night (430)

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