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• (210): View more from Texas

  I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"

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• (931): View more from Tennessee

  Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.

  (1-931): View more from Tennessee

  Wtf? What happened?

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.

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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.

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  23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below

  (773): View more from Illinois

  When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"

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• (247): View more from

  That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.

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  These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious

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• (917): View more from New York City

  No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.

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• (916): View more from California

  I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?

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• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.

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