is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
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